Support from Family/Friends

[Marotta]

How supportive are your family and friends of your training?

Personally, My friends are very supportive, and some have even taken an interest in Powerlifting/GPP because of me, but my parents on the other hand drive me insane. I'm currently training to compete in powerlifting, right now I'm only at 165, but I'm gaining about 5lb/2 weeks, and my parents are telling me I'm fat, I'm at what I'd estimate to be about 12% body fat, maybe less, and they're starting to say they're worried about my health. Pisses me off.

Anyone else get discouraged by loved ones? or is everyone around you supportive of what you do?

[Nauticus]

Everyone scoffs at GOMAD like I'm insane.

[Sami]

Yeah my lady isn't that keen tbh. She doesn't mind the size, but she doesn't like the extra fat too much.

But the bigger issue is that she doesn't get why I would want to spend 3 hours a week in the gym when that could be 3 more hours a week spent with her. :|

[IWillLiveFreeOrDie]

My wife is very supportive. I was in really good shape when we met, and then became a fat ass. Nothing spreads ass like commitment!

She gets a little worried that I'm going to hurt myself, or push myself too far, but she is just overly conservative.

[Marotta]

Everyone scoffs at GOMAD like I'm insane.

Yeah, when I pull out bottles of milk in class everyone stares at me like I'm insane, and the teachers always want to know why.

[stronger]

No one cares and neither do I.

[cjangelo]

Nothing spreads ass like commitment!

Yeah, it usually takes a while for a girl to get comfortable dating you before they'll...wait, what the fuck are we talking about here again?

[Platus]

I think some friends are a bit intimidated by it or perhaps associate it with bodybuilding, which is annoying, but pretty much everyone has seen it as positive. My girlfriend has starting doing SS with me and was genuinely surprised to find that she finds me more attractive with 50 more lbs. on my frame than when she met me. The milk, however, is a subject of much teasing.

[knkavo]

Change of any kind will always make some people uncomfortable, especially if that change is for the better.

[BCS]

Change of any kind will always make some people uncomfortable, especially if that change is for the better.

Truth.

[Buscotucky]

I'm catching some heat from the wife about the belly gain. She could care less about the large increases in my squat & deadlift...:D

[scotty022]

My father knows a lot of orthopedists and from time to time will repeat the argument that squats are bad for the knees, and deadlifts bad for the back. He's got the best of intentions, and he's not lazy about his arguments--he's actually talked to some internationally-known orthopods--and it gets tough to convince him otherwise. Speaking of which, I've done some searching for scientific studies establishing the safety of squats and deadlifts, and so far all I've found is Kilgore's collection of rates of injury incidence in the weight room vs. other sports (in SS). For some reason this has not been convincing--he wants more data and specific studies, given that what I'm saying flies in the face of some very smart people, who are claiming first-hand knowledge of squats hurting knees. Does anyone know where I can find a study on the safety of lifting, or one of the studies refuting the old UT study that started this mess?

Other than that, my friends and family are uninterested, which is fine with me.

[Webbie]

Compared to my past two hobbies (competitive aerobatics and cycling) I would say my family is about 100 times more confortable with weightlifting. It's mainly because I'm pretty much gauranteed to show back up at the dinner table after a weight session. Bad things can happen when you have a bad day flying upside down or riding on the open roads with cars.

[Platus]

Does anyone know where I can find a study on the safety of lifting, or one of the studies refuting the old UT study that started this mess?I couldn't read the whole article, but the abstract said that the competitive weightlifters, power lifters, and novices doing squats for 8 weeks did not show any significant differences in "knee stability" from control groups. I cannot review the methodology (i.e. what is their definition of a "squat") but they seem to have done tests for ligament health and the inclusion of competition lifters probably ensures that many were doing full squats.

http://journals.lww.com/acsm-msse/Abstract/1989/06000/The_effect_of_the_squat_exercise_on_knee_stability .12.aspx

[IWillLiveFreeOrDie]

Compared to my past two hobbies (competitive aerobatics and cycling) I would say my family is about 100 times more confortable with weightlifting. It's mainly because I'm pretty much gauranteed to show back up at the dinner table after a weight session. Bad things can happen when you have a bad day flying upside down or riding on the open roads with cars.

LOL, I first read that as "Competitive Aerobics", and thought I would keep a hobby like that to myself.

Competitive Aerobatics sounds a little more bad ass. I used to race motorcycles, and my family like weightlifting a lot better!

[Webbie]

Ha! Too funny. Yeah, pulling 8G at the bottom of a hammerhead is a little more bad ass than step class.

[JayvH]

My father knows a lot of orthopedists and from time to time will repeat the argument that squats are bad for the knees, and deadlifts bad for the back.
Did you give him Starting Strength to read? If so, what did he say about Rip's arguments regarding the safe squat?

[Raskolnikov]

Are there any studies showing that squats are bad for the knees? Usually the burden of proof is on the individual making a claim -- the opinion of an orthopedist hardly constitutes proof. Very few have any personal experience with the lift or with people who perform the lift correctly.

[Dastardly]

Are there any studies showing that squats are bad for the knees? Usually the burden of proof is on the individual making a claim -- the opinion of an orthopedist hardly constitutes proof. Very few have any personal experience with the lift or with people who perform the lift correctly.

Also consider that this myth/rhetoric is based around the most commonly know form of squatting. A high-bar done at poor depth with bad technique by some curl-monkey wannabe bodybuilder who stacked six plates on for their first attempt.

[Patrick]

I know that this is a typical guy thing because I did it way before I ever lifted a weight, but I like to carry all the shit in from the car in one shot... if it means stacking things or putting ten bags around my pinky finger then so be it. Anyway, I was unloading the car for a girlfriend and there were a few boxes. They were heavy as far as boxes from the car go but they weren't actually heavy. I asked her to load me up she said "it's heavy" and I said something that I got a lot of mileage out of, "I lift heavy things as a hobby." I wasn't trying to be boastful but just to communicate that our ideas of heavy were different. Anyway, she liked it.

But I'm just like most of you guys... I catch a rash of shit every time I tell someone I squat. I hear how my knees will be destroyed, yadda yadda yadda. When I say "they haven't yet" I just get "it's only a matter of time". I used to care and used to reply but I don't bother anymore.

I get loads of flak for the milk, too. Or rather, I did when I was going GOMAD.

[applescruffette]

My family is supportive.

My husband has been commenting lately (even today) about how well my legs and shoulders are filling out. It appears that he is quite happy.

My mother (and father by proxy) bought me a Bella bar from Rogue for Christmas, so I'd say my parents are supportive.

[scotty022]

Platus, thanks for the link. This will help.

Jayvh, Raskolnikov, Dastardly--Dad feels, reasonably, that the question should be answered empirically. Since he values the orthopods' reported experiences over Coach Rippetoe's reported experiences, SS, and Strong Enough, have been of limited help.

He'll come around at some point. I actually bring it up with him on purpose from time to time--he had meniscus surgery a while back, and I don't like his rehab program.

[Rorschach]

Whenever I visited my parents, they used to be dismayed by me eating half a dozen eggs for breakfast. Lots of comments about cholesterol, etc etc.
To get them off my back, and partially for my own peace of mind, I had two cholesterol tests done 7 months apart, showing a slight decrease.
That's got them off my back about my diet, at least.

However, by dad still comments about squats. He's all for me training, but he's definitely in the high squat camp. I've explained my reasoning, but some English rugby captain from the 70s says deep squats are bad for you, and of course he's never heard of Rippetoe, Kilgore, Tate etc.
We've agreed to disagree on this though, and the fact I've never had an injury in the year and a half I've been training has thankfully helped keep him quiet. ;)

There's a lot of bad science which has become accepted in common knowledge, and if your actions challenge that, people are always going to question you. If you're satisfied what you're doing is for the best though, you shouldn't let that bother you. :)

[scotty022]

Agreed, Rorshach--in the end, the proof is in the pudding. It all becomes another incentive to concentrate even more on solid form. And that's not a bad thing.

I'm also lucky to have parents that worry, rather than parents that don't give a damn.

[Jamie J. Skibicki]

Scotty,

First thing you need to do is define the squat. If you meet on of the doctors, have them demonstrate it for you. I had a doctor tell me the same thing "squats are bad for your knees". SO I asked him to demonstrate and spent 15 minutes correcting his form. He agreed that my way was much safer.

[scotty022]

I like that idea.

The key is just getting him to accept the idea that the stories told him by the docs are incomplete or don't apply to what I'm doing. These docs are good guys, and very smart; they just don't see the distinction between "squats are bad for the knees," and "incorrect squats are bad for the knees." Maybe I just need to talk to his orthopedist buddy.

[mrRed]

My wife thinks I overdo it (she might be right as I feel like I'm damn near always hurting myself and I'm going to be resetting for form purposes this week) and I look funny when lifting (I have serious case of red-face with bulgy veins), but she's a big fan of the increased muscle mass/strength and understands that the little belly fat added isn't anything to worry about as it'll come off pretty easy when the time comes.

[JayvH]

Jayvh, Raskolnikov, Dastardly--Dad feels, reasonably, that the question should be answered empirically. Since he values the orthopods' reported experiences over Coach Rippetoe's reported experiences, SS, and Strong Enough, have been of limited help.
OK, I just thought that for example page 11 and 12 give some good arguments why a full and correct squat is relatively harmless to the knee and would like to hear an expert argue against ist.

My mother is a physio and also not thrilled that I do deep squats. But I can't get her to read the book.

[cjangelo]

First thing you need to do is define the squat. If you meet on of the doctors, have them demonstrate it for you. I had a doctor tell me the same thing "squats are bad for your knees". SO I asked him to demonstrate and spent 15 minutes correcting his form. He agreed that my way was much safer.

Very impressive, both on your part for being convincing and on your doc's part for being open to being convinced. Very impressive indeed.



I don't know what officious pricks you people are dealing with all the fucking time, though. Who the fuck asks about your squatting? No one has ever said shit to me. Get over 200lbs, grow a goddamn beard, and start moving a couple plates per side and people will start asking you for advice, not giving it.

[Patrick]

I don't know what officious pricks you people are dealing with all the fucking time, though. Who the fuck asks about your squatting? No one has ever said shit to me. Get over 200lbs, grow a goddamn beard, and start moving a couple plates per side and people will start asking you for advice, not giving it.

Are you kidding? We live in a world where a nun would offer injection advice to Barry Bonds. Knowing shit and talking about shit have absolutely nothing to do with today's world.

[semperteneo]

i get comments on my shoulders and ass being bigger. a TON of crap about the milk from people thinking it's silly to have all that fat in your blood stream. my wife LOVES the size and my willingness to do physical things around the house which are a result of my training.

what i do find funny is that people that tend to complain about the fat content in the milk or how too much is supposed to be bad for you also talk about how they always wanted to get huge but "can't" gain weight. one, however, is about 135-140 and lactose intolerant and claims to ingest 5-6000 calories daily. he "can't" gain weight and has stopped talking with me about it the more weight i gain.

i can't wait to be pushing 220 lbs and seeing people i barely see. that'll be interesting...

[JCavin]

i can't wait to be pushing 220 lbs and seeing people i barely see. that'll be interesting...

Heh, this has been the best part for me.

I weighed 178 on October 3rd. Last week I was up to 223. That's a lot of damn weight, especially when most of it is in your ass and shoulders.

I work in a jail and i'm constantly seeing people I haven't seen in a long time. It's amazing how much more respect you'll get out of a detainee when they know you could shove their head up their own ass.

[TartanEagle]

It's amazing how much more respect you'll get out of a detainee when they know you could shove their head up their own ass.

This is a great quote. You should trademark it.

[Weakling]

I've been told recently that I've developed a black girl's ass. :confused:

[milk farts]

I've been told recently that I've developed a black girl's ass. :confused:
I've also been told I'm "getting a booty."

As for supportiveness

I think my friends think it's cool

One guy I work with who lifts is skeptical of GOMAD. He's going the "clean bulk" route by avoiding unhealthy food. He's also doing some routine that includes 50 reps of lunges and multiple sets to exhaustion of 70 lb barbell curls. I'll just have to get way bigger than him

My dad is supportive. He lifted a lot in high school and didn't think a second about form and ended up hurting his back. Still he hasn't discouraged me one bit

My step-dad hasn't said anything discouraging. I think he likes that I'm doing it b/c it is manly

Then there's my mom. lol women. She has threatened to ban creatine from the house b/c I was getting headaches back in high school when I was taking it and my doctor said not to take it b/c the studies aren't in. Also, my aunt told her that doctors gave creatine to my cousin who has muscular dystrophy and it was eating away at his liver. She also says I'm gaining weight too fast and that I will regret this when I'm older and I get fat. Then I get my chalk in the mail the other day and she says "what is it, steroids?" and storms off. On the bright side she hasn't brought up creatine since we argued about it and I've just kept taking it no problem. Also, I left 3 fish oil capsules and 2 lactose intolerance therapy pills in the kitchen the other day but she just yelled my name and "there's a bunch of pills up here on the counter" and didn't bother me.