You Ideal Woman

[Gary Gibson]

Well, yet another relationship has failed to work out for me. If were up to me, I'd not date any more vegetarian artists, but that sorta thing seems to keep coming my way.

My ideal woman would...

a) Powerlift and/or weightlift;
b) Share my libertarian/anarchist view of the world and government;
c) Not be averse to making pornography for possible commercial consumption.

It's not like I'm asking for the moon here.

Feel free to add your laundry list.

edit: Now that I think about it, I'd add:

d) Cooks.
e) Can live without reproducing.

But those are probably on a lot of guys' lists along with

f) Encourages me to have sex with other women.

[TomF]

You're familiar with Venn diagrams, yes?

Why not illustrate "not asking for the moon here" showing notional overlapping circles of A, B, and C as a proportion of the total female population within about 10 years of your age.

BTW, I married the ideal woman. You're not getting her.

[Chewie_jrc]

Keep your distance from the Vegan-dating my friend. Only one word comes to mind (at least the ones i've been with): militant. Good luck.

[Scott_Robison]

My guess is the militant part is attractive to Gary's political requirements. The real question is, where are you meeting these chicks? If you keep hanging out in the same places and keep ending up with the same kind of women, maybe you need a change of venue.

[TomF]

Keep your distance from the Vegan-dating my friend. ....Dunno. I think it's a quaint idea to keep a vegan or two around, in case I feel a bit hungry.

[Briks42]

There are only 2 requirements. Is enjoyable to spend your time with and is good looking. The rest is all details.

[OldMike]

#1- rich

#2- see #1

:D

[MazdaMatt]

There are only 2 requirements. Is enjoyable to spend your time with and is good looking. The rest is all details.

DING!

After relationships with the Russian balerina and the Chinese model, I decided that I wanted to date a "cool chick"... that was 4 years ago and we own a house now.

I consider myself lucky for learning this seeing as most people don't seem to.

[Marotta]

Physical Attraction
Being in some sort of good shape, whether it be running, a sport or weights
Similar sense of humor

[Gwynn]

Well, yet another relationship has failed to work out for me. If were up to me, I'd not date any more vegetarian artists, but that sorta thing seems to keep coming my way.

My ideal woman would...

a) Powerlift and/or weightlift;
b) Share my libertarian/anarchist view of the world and government;
c) Not be averse to making pornography for possible commercial consumption.

It's not like I'm asking for the moon here.

Feel free to add your laundry list.

edit: Now that I think about it, I'd add:

d) Cooks.
e) Can live without reproducing.

But those are probably on a lot of guys' lists along with

f) Encourages me to have sex with other women.

Well, I'm sorry to hear it. Does that mean you get to start eating more? ;-)

You might find someone if you add this to your item "f":
"I encourage her to have sex with other men."

[MazdaMatt]

...and what's your ideal woman, Gwynn?

btw, my GF would leave me if I suggested sleeping with other men. When she goes out I have to ENCOURAGE her to dress nicely. I also encourage her to get free drinks from men because it reflects better on our cheque book at the end of the month. And the drunker she is when she gets home... ;)

[Gary Gibson]

Well, I'm sorry to hear it. Does that mean you get to start eating more? ;-)

You might find someone if you add this to your item "f":
"I encourage her to have sex with other men."

Only if I'm allowed to film it occasionally.

[Gwynn]

...and what's your ideal woman, Gwynn?


I'll take Gary's.

[Gwynn]

Only if I'm allowed to film it occasionally.

Now that's fair! :D

[TomV]

A Maltese or Italian girl with a good personality.


Best body type (mmmmmmm big boobs, big butt).

They (traditionally) like to cook, I like to eat.

The only thing that irks me is that pesky catholicism...

[Gwynn]

btw, my GF would leave me if I suggested sleeping with other men. When she goes out I have to ENCOURAGE her to dress nicely. I also encourage her to get free drinks from men because it reflects better on our cheque book at the end of the month. And the drunker she is when she gets home... ;)

My boyfriend doesn't want to sleep with other women either, sadly.

[MazdaMatt]

I agree that if YOU find that sad, then it is sad. Especially if you didn't mean while you're not there. Unless it is only because it would have to go both ways... Then I get it.

[gamedog]

After two years of marriage I'm amazed at how my blueprint of the ideal woman has changed.

For me, the perfect girl would be someone who matched the following criteria:

1. She wouldn't have an entourage of needy people in her life that require her constant support/attention/help/reassurance ...
2. She would be more introverted, like I am
3. She would appreciate strange, "boring" independent films
4. She would appreciate strange, "weird" independent music
5. She would not be one of these girls who thinks she has to be a "strong-willed, hard ass" as a means by which to cover up for her own insecurity and self doubt
6. She would have a psychotherapist that she visits once every week. Perferrably twice a week.
7. She wouldn't nag me about stupid meaningless nonsense

I could go on and on, really.

I didn't look at things this way when I was a bachelor. Now I do. Oh how our minds change as we have life experiences.

[MazdaMatt]

That was all about your wife, wasn't it?

[Carlos Daniel]

Dunno. I think it's a quaint idea to keep a vegan or two around, in case I feel a bit hungry.

I think people are taking this "grass fed" thing a little bit too far.

[drlvegas]

Well, yet another relationship has failed to work out for me. If were up to me, I'd not date any more vegetarian artists, but that sorta thing seems to keep coming my way.

My ideal woman would...

a) Powerlift and/or weightlift;
b) Share my libertarian/anarchist view of the world and government;
c) Not be averse to making pornography for possible commercial consumption.

It's not like I'm asking for the moon here.

Feel free to add your laundry list.

edit: Now that I think about it, I'd add:

d) Cooks.
e) Can live without reproducing.

But those are probably on a lot of guys' lists along with

f) Encourages me to have sex with other women.

My wife fits none of these. I still forbid her from reading these forums out of fear that Gary may one day post a photo of his penis.

[Nauticus]

1. Does squats
2. Introvert (aka can put up with my boring personality)
3. Attractive yet flawed
4. Finds most meaning in the immaterial

[gamedog]

That was all about your wife, wasn't it?

Some of it was and some of it wasn't. For instance, my wife probably doesn't need to see a psychotherapist. And she doesn't have a whole lot of insecurity issues, either. Personality-wise, she's great, we can watch Ren And Stimpy reruns on DVD and drink beer, or cool Martin Scorsesse movies, or even Wes Anderson films too. Plus, she digs slasher movies, too and doesn't mind watching the weird movies I like, unless it's Woody Allen. And we can joke around with one another and though we actually disagree on quite a few things, normally it doesn't get in the way of the relationship. Plus, she rocks my world in bed, every single time.

So it wasn't all about her, I threw in the bulk of the stuff from previous relationships, like my ex fiancee who was a heroin addict and Kerri the uber-feminist who was really just an insecure basketcase who never mentally evolved past the age of 19 or so. Or the bulemic wanna-be actress... I never really did very well picking girls to date when I was younger. And I got burned a lot LOL

All things considered, my wife is really cool. Probably cooler than most wives. But it is difficult, because she likes people, and, well, I don't. And she hates Woody Allen. But I can forgive the Woody Allen thing, some people just don't get him. I do wish that her friends didn't have so much drama that they're always bringing to my doorstep, though. Only because of how badly it stresses her out. Seems like her stress makes me go off... I don't get that.

[Ian Kovtunovich]

Kate Walsh with my wife's brain (witty, word-nerd goofball), my taste in music (obnoxious punk) and booze (whisky!), and an unstoppable motivation for physical activity.

Mmmm...

I was trying to get psyched up for my workout one day, and every once in a while I write something motivational on the little white board I write down my lifts on. On this particular occasion, I put "KATE WALSH." I did hit my PRs.

[drlvegas]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oai3mUL-T-I

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VDss8V2OME4&feature=related

[broseph]

I clicked on this thread hoping for some pictures... Huge disappointment.

Luckily, these sorts of pictures are not exactly elusive.

Just kidding, I'm a total pussy and love my wife lick crazy.

I see now that misspelling, but to change such a Freudian slip would be disingenuous. Thank you interweb, for exposing my sexual appetite to this sausage fest of a forum.

[SamGriffin]

http://i716.photobucket.com/albums/ww164/vinny1890/freida-pinto11.jpg

[TomF]

20 years into a marriage, it is interesting to see how one's priorities change.

It's damned pleasant that Herself still looks very fine, and the fact that she was a stunner was indeed one of the things that caught my attention all those years ago. But what's made it last 20 years, and make me hope for 20 more had zip to do with the shape of her butt or her jawline.

"Ideal" has a lot to do with the entirely quirky ways her head and her heart work, and her utter lack of interest in making herself the center of the world. Those things have got far better with time, almost in direct proportion to the inevitable fading of her looks. And mine, FWIW.

[Gary Gibson]

My wife fits none of these. I still forbid her from reading these forums out of fear that Gary may one day post a photo of his penis.

I understand your fear. But my fear of the all-powerful moderator is even greater. She's as frightening in her own way as she is beautiful.

[drlvegas]

She's as frightening in her own way as she is beautiful.

Holy shit. Does she fit the other criteria?

[Gary Gibson]

Holy shit. Does she fit the other criteria?

I am not touching this one with an intensity that borders on the superhuman. I am anti-touching it. I am running away. May the gods have mercy on your soul.

[JStrong]

Did Gary just ask Stef to do pornography with him and then feebly change the subject?

I sense a precipitous drop from your status as 'Money' sir.



(please don't erase my training log.)

[Gary Gibson]

Did Gary just ask Stef to do pornography with him and then feebly change the subject?

I sense a precipitous drop from your status as 'Money' sir.



(please don't erase my training log.)

Nope. Never happened. I been set up.

Quick. Everybody look over here (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8_RfK2rp2To).

[Rorschach]

My boyfriend doesn't want to sleep with other women either, sadly.

Well, when you've tasted perfection...

</creep> :D

[Rorschach]

Also I'm surprised no-one has brought up this forum's anthem.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ctVmNbVu2KA

[Ian Kovtunovich]

Quick. Everybody look over here (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8_RfK2rp2To).

Hmm...maybe add "with a pole-vaulter's body and fashion sense" to my vote for Kate Walsh. Those pole-vaulters are lithe, athletic creatures, and they all wear the tiny shorts and sport perky pony tails.

[OITW]

Well, when you've tasted perfection...

</creep> :D

Keep trying, R, you'll win her over someday!

[SamGriffin]

I also encourage her to get free drinks from men because it reflects better on our cheque book at the end of the month.

Seriously???

[Guido]

My ideal woman would...

a) Powerlift and/or weightlift;
b) Share my libertarian/anarchist view of the world and government;
c) Not be averse to making pornography for possible commercial consumption.

It's not like I'm asking for the moon here.

Feel free to add your laundry list.

edit: Now that I think about it, I'd add:

d) Cooks.
e) Can live without reproducing.

But those are probably on a lot of guys' lists along with

f) Encourages me to have sex with other women.

a: check
b: check
c: nope
d: check
e: check
f: nope

Well, 4 out of 6 ain't bad and frankly, I can live without "c" and am content right now without "f". ;)

[MazdaMatt]

Seriously???

Haha, not reallyfor that reason - the point was there's no fear of infidelity.

[Stu Hughes]

This. (NSFW)
(http://www.modelmayhem.com/portfolio/189858/0)

[Oopswrongthread]

And a happy Canada Day to you too!

[toddmr]

Likes SciFi has to be on any self-respecting list of traits for the ideal woman.

[Bif]

It won't happen at this stage in my life, but I would love to have hooked up with a chick who'd look at me and say, "Maybe we should make the tee time an hour earlier so we can be back in time for the kickoff."

Then, of course, at halftime I'd be on the couch with a beer, while she was in front of the couch on her knees.

Dream on motherfucker...

[drlvegas]

It won't happen at this stage in my life, but I would love to have hooked up with a chick who'd look at me and say, "Maybe we should make the tee time an hour earlier so we can be back in time for the kickoff."

Then, of course, at halftime I'd be on the couch with a beer, while she was in front of the couch on her knees.

Dream on motherfucker...

Have a sex change, and start dating a lesbian.

[Rorschach]

Dating men would probably be cheaper.

[Gary Gibson]

Men are so easy.

[Bif]

Have a sex change, and start dating a lesbian.
Funny you should write that. At one job I had a few years ago (I had just got divorced), I met a rather attractive woman who also worked there. She had shoulder length curly hair, a nice, easy smile, was a great conversationalist and on top of it all, had a kick-ass body -- good size rack, nice ass. From talking with her I found out she did some personal training, loved to deadlift (an iron chick!), loved sports (particularly American football!) and loved to golf. OMG, the winning lottery ticket! While pondering whether or not to pursue, I was mentioning these stellar attributes to the guy in the cube next to mine. He goes to me, "Dude! She's married to another woman!" Can you all hear the sound of air coming out of the balloon? Fuck.

[pwn]

Bif, perhaps this (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sC75aU47GRk) was the sound of the air?

This is my ideal woman. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZDVbznp6aTk) And she knows jiu jitsu and is low to the ground, so don't fuck with her!

[Bif]

Bif, perhaps this (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sC75aU47GRk) was the sound of the air?
Hah! That's a great sound effect. It also could be used to define what finally happened to the permanent semi-bone I'd get whenever the chick was around.